In our modern age of convenience and central heating, it’s easy to forget that winter was historically the season of death and starvation. People spent the frigid months huddled together telling stories of monsters as dangerous as the cold. In those days, the twelve days of Christmas weren’t celebrated with reverence and prayer; they were, instead, multi-day feasts so debaucherous and irreverent that Christmas was banned in Renaissance England. In these conditions, it’s no wonder that there are many winter traditions, tales, and legends much more unique than those popular in America. After much research and consideration, these are my top eight selections.
#8: Krampus is a Central European Christmas demon originating from Germany and Austria. Like Santa Claus, Krampus is a tale told to children to make them behave. Unlike Santa, however, Krampus puts misbehaving kids in a bag and takes them home and eats them. Though the child bag sounds very fun, Krampus comes in last – at #8 – because he’s just too popular now.
7: Though flipping a tree upside down is less rad then winter ghouls, its origin as a symbol was meant to oppose the worship of oak trees by Central European pagans, keeping it out of last place. People carrying on the tradition, ignorant to the fact that a hundred generations ago their heathen ancestors were converted by a monk, is very metal.#6: The Mexican “Night of the Radishes”, or “Noche de Rábanos”, is a festival that happens every December in Oaxaca, Mexico. The festival consists – you guessed it – mostly of radishes; specifically, intricately carved radish sculptures. While not technically holiday related, it is an interesting event that happens in December, and, most years, someone carves the crucifixion out of radishes, so it makes the list.#5: Grýla is a cave-dwelling ogre that’s said to live in the mountains of Iceland. The stories say she comes down every year during the Christmas season to eat misbehaving children. While that makes her basically the same as Krampus, Grýla has some extra lore that makes her iconic. She’s a mother of 13, has had three husbands, and she’s the owner of a giant cat we’ll get to later. She might just be gender-bent Krampus, but my support for divorced queens and cat owners puts Grýla at number five.#4: Speaking of Grýla’s cat, the Yule Cat is a monstrous black cat who eats people who don’t receive new clothing for Christmas. When he’s not roaming the countryside looking for people who got PS5’s instead of socks, he’s described as being Grýla’s “house pet.”#3: The Yule Lads are the last Icelandic creature on the list, but undoubtedly the goofiest. The Yule lads are 13 mischievous little men, and the byproduct of Grýla’s most recent marriage. Like their mom, the Yule lads come out only during Christmas, but instead of eating people, they commit very specific crimes. We have Yogurt Gulper, who will break into your house and eat all your yogurt; there’s Doorway Smeller, who will smell your door; you can’t forget Candle Stealer, who eats candles.#2: The Gävle Goat is a massive straw goat that’s put up by the town of Gävle, Sweden every winter. This by itself is uninteresting, but since 1966 there’s been an arms race between the police and Gävle’s more “booze-Inclined” population. Every year (illegally, mind you) people try to destroy the goat. Though the police have tried fences, prison sentences, and 24 hour surveillance, they’re still losing 38-19 against the drunkards over the last 57 years. Though the goat is usually destroyed by fire, it’s also been hit by a car, and somehow stolen multiple times despite the fact it’s around 20 feet tall and several hundred pounds.#1: Taking the number one spot on our list of holiday traditions is Mari Lwyd from Southern Wales. Mari Lwyd is a horse skull draped in a cloth that’s carried around rural towns at night during the Christmas season. The horse is followed by a procession of young men, who go door to door with the skull challenging households to “rhyming duels” (rap battles). If the people in the house win the duel then the Mari Lwyd leaves, but if the Mari Lwyd wins then they get all the beer in the house. My favorite thing about the Mari Lwyd is that its name means Holy Mary, which means these drunk Welsh teens and their dead horse know the true meaning of Christmas.
