Ryan McDearmont

I’m a big fan of Nicolas Cage. Like, really big. Like, “Hand out Nicolas Cage Valentines and go see Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance the day it came out” big. I think he has some genuinely well-acted films, and I love seeing him have on-screen meltdowns that cross into complete hilarity. So when I heard he had a new movie coming out, Stolen, I knew I had to go see it.

In Stolen, directed by Simon West, Cage plays a former burglar, turned a new leaf after spending eight years in prison because of a heist job gone wrong. The heist job in question concluded when Cage’s character, Will, accidentally shot his partner Vincent(played by Josh Lucas) in the leg and then made off with $10,000,000 dollars in cash, which he then burned in order to escape prosecution by the police. The plot of the film picks up when Will gets out of prison. His ex-partner Vincent kidnaps his daughter as revenge and demands $10,000,000 in return.

When inspected closer, the plot of Stolen is very convoluted. However, it’s not meant to be analyzed. It’s meant to be an obligatory set-up for the action that will follow, as are the plots of most action films. And action is something Stolen contains plenty of. In multiple instances, Cage leads police officers on car chases across New Orleans that cause more property damage than a hurricane. He single-handedly subdues two FBI officers in an elevator. He breaks his hand to escape from handcuffs, and then shakes it off like nothing happened. His character, who is never explicitly stated to have received any sort of physical training, acts like a superhuman. He jumps down three stories and just keeps running. Even then, Cage’s character is perhaps the most believable in the entire film.

Josh Lucas as Will’s deranged partner Vincent delivers the type of cinematic insanity I had expected from Cage. He hobbles about on his one leg muttering unintelligible dialogue. He freaks out over nothing in particular. One of his most memorable scenes is when he rants to a police officer about his father who died of bone cancer, and then pulls out a gun and shoots the officer, who was probably just as confused as I was. Watching the character of Vincent onscreen is like watching a paranoid schizophrenic man stumble through some sort of Moby Dick fantasy in which he is Captain Ahab. The character is obsessed with getting some sort of revenge on Will, but we never really learn why, besides the accident that cost him his leg.

There is also the question of Will’s daughter Alison, played by Sami Gayle. Why does she trust this random taxi driver who is obviously not taking her to her destination? Where is her mother, Will’s ex-wife? She is never shown, nor even mentioned. What does she think of her daughter’s kidnapping? Does she even know? On his way out of prison, there is a scene where Cage’s character buys a stuffed animal as a present for Alison. This may remind certain viewers of Con Air, another Simon West film starring Cage. Is this an intentional callback to Con Air’s bunny in the box? I’d like to think so. I actually prefer Con Air over Stolen, because it actually seizes any opportunity for camp and goes with it. Stolen has obvious chances to become campy, but it seems afraid to run with it. Besides the character of Vincent, who I still don’t know if I was supposed to take seriously or not, and Will’s method of stealing gold, the film takes itself way too seriously for what it is. There is some intentional humor, but not enough to offset the movie’s almost try-hard seriousness.

Overall, Stolen is not a totally bad film. As long as you don’t mind questionable characters, an even more questionable soundtrack, more than a few clichés and dialogue that at times can seem bizarre and disconnected, it provides solid action entertainment. It’s not as fun as I might have liked, but I suppose that can’t be helped. Not every action movie can be a camp classic.

Rating: 2.5/5